• I got quite a scare
    When I realised my mind was everywhere
    It was a walking talking living nightmare
    Yeah…I was playing silly buggers
    Deep in the dragon’s lair
    I wasn’t all there
    It was now
    But I wasn’t here
    I was paralysed by fear
    See I was afraid to look at the truth
    of my incarnational situation
    I wasn’t facing the ways
    In which I was blaming
    My own creations
    For the unconsciously created
    Effects of my manic mental manipulations
    I was blaming my own manifestations
    For the mess I was creating
    Plainly stated
    I had no idea what I was doing
    Looking back on it now
    I find it all quite amusing
    But during my confusion
    I refused to view
    How I was deluding myself
    Using denial as a tool
    For fooling myself
    Into imagining I could actually escape from myself
    Through some kind of emergency identity extraction
    It took me a lifetime to realise
    ‘That I am the consequences of my actions
    Profound realisations
    Are a bit like tooth extractions
    At the time they hurt like hell
    But afterwards you’re damn glad you had them
    Like when my life became a game of truth of dare
    The day I realised my mind was everywhere.

    Everybody knows that dreams symbolise our waking life
    But it can be quite a fright
    To see the outside world
    Mirroring our inner strife
    Try seeing all of the things that you don’t like
    As symbolic reflections
    Of the patterns of your own mind
    You may find
    This kind of divine signpost
    As frightening as the concept
    Of the devil take the hindmost
    But my most poignant and powerful epiphanies
    Have come as a result
    Of this deep self reflection
    Wherein my inner direction
    Is made manifest
    As an external projection
    Understanding the limits of my perception
    My objective was to find the most effective means
    For integrating both positive and negative streams
    Of my consciousness
    Not just the day to day stuff
    That I love to conjure up
    But the karmic smooth and the karmic rough
    I have to have the guts
    To dig up and love the muck
    That lies on the seabed of my soul
    Because my goal
    Is to see the George Bust in me
    Not to cushion me
    From the dysfunctional aspects of humanity
    But to see those dysfunctions
    In my own mentality
    To live a life of truth or dare
    By realising my mind is everywhere.
    Of course I haven’t really
    Realised my mind is everywhere.

    It’s just an ancient future memory
    That I thought I’d share
    It’s something of which
    I’m only intellectually aware
    And that’s not even in the same ball park
    As being there
    So I don’t dare
    To stare the Universe in the eye
    Unless I actually experience myself
    As the Universal Mind
    See I find
    My life doesn’t move in straight lines
    It spirals and it climbs
    It loops and it rewinds
    Yet sometimes
    It’s dark and shrouded in ignorance
    Whilst at the same time
    Being filled with the most meaningful coincidence
    It seems meaningless but has this tremendous significance
    It’s a perplexingly paradoxical existence
    But with the willingness to accept the silliness
    Of this ambivalence
    And the magnificence
    Of the equivalence
    Between the cause and effect
    I begin to realise
    That the world I see
    Is the world I project
    The reality I live in
    Is the reality I select
    The film of my life
    Is a film I direct
    So it doesn’t have to resemble a train wreck
    It can be perfect
    When I let go of all my preconceived preferences
    And am as empty
    As this sentence is
    As unnecessary
    As this em-phasis
    When I identify with
    The infinite emptiness….
    ….Instead of the masks
    it chooses to wear
    when I’m really not being there…
    that’s really being there…EVERYWHERE
    Chris Paradox

Poem by Chris Paradox

About The Author:

Ben has been a practical pain management trainer and a celebrated massage therapist. He believes human well-being is deeply connected to the health of mind and body both, including deep tissues. He holds numerous certifications for best of breeds massage techniques helping him on a mission for healthy London and then rest of the world. He has been an active contributor in massage technique research and on Massaggi blog.